Daily Thoughts from Deuteronomy 3:23-27: Let Me Cross Over (A’eb’rah-Na)

5. Let Me Cross Over (A’eb’rah-Na)

 “Then I pleaded with Yahweh, ‘Sovereign Yahweh, you have begun to reveal your greatness to your servant, and your strong hand — for what other god is there in heaven or on earth that can do the works and mighty deeds that you do?  Please! Let me go across and see the good land on the other side of the Yarden, that wonderful hill-country and the L’vanon!’  But Yahweh was angry with me on account of you, and he didn’t listen to me. Yahweh said to me, ‘Enough from you! Don’t say another word to me about this matter!  Climb up to the top of Pisgah and look out to the west, north, south and east. Look with your eyes — but you will not go across this Yarden.

(D’varim 3:23-27)

The fire had died out and the sun had come up and he was still alive.  No creature had attacked him while he slept.  He was thankful to Yahweh for life but his sleep had nonetheless suffered.  He didn’t feel watched right now.  He carefully peered around outside his cave for any signs that some creature was still about.  Nothing.  Cautiously he stepped outside and searched the area for tracks, but besides his own sandal marks he saw no evidence that any living thing might have been stalking him last night.

He utilized his latrine with some nervousness that he was vulnerable to attack.  He gathered some more fuel for his fire and calmed himself by singing a psalm.

You who live in the shelter of ‘Elyon,
who spend your nights in the shadow of Shaddai,
who say to Yahweh, “My refuge! My fortress!
My God, in whom I trust!” —
he will rescue you from the trap of the hunter
and from the plague of calamities;
he will cover you with his pinions,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his truth is a shield and protection.

You will not fear the terrors of night
or the arrow that flies by day,
or the plague that roams in the dark,
or the scourge that wreaks havoc at noon.
A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand;
but it won’t come near you.
Only keep your eyes open,
and you will see how the wicked are punished.

For you have made Yahweh, the Most High,
who is my refuge, your dwelling-place.
No disaster will happen to you,
no calamity will come near your tent;
for he will order his angels to care for you
and guard you wherever you go.
They will carry you in their hands,
so that you won’t trip on a stone.
You will tread down lions and snakes,
young lions and serpents you will trample underfoot.
“Because he loves me, I will rescue him;
because he knows my name, I will protect him.
He will call on me, and I will answer him.
I will be with him when he is in trouble.
I will extricate him and bring him honor.
I will satisfy him with long life
and show him my salvation.”

He felt greatly comforted.  Anxiety washed off him and peace came back to reside.  He couldn’t help but wonder how his people had felt, out here in yeshimon, without a secure source of water or food other than Yahweh Himself.  Did their hearts quake as his had last night?  Did they find it hard to face each day with the calm that trust in Yahweh’s provision brought?

He opened D’varim to read Moshe’s words.  Moshe and Yisrael had been witnessing the power of Yahweh to defeat their enemies and had begun distributing land on the east of the river Yarden to those tribes who wished to remain there after helping their brothers possess the land on the west side of the river.  And understandably, Moshe longed to enter that land with them.  He asked Yahweh for an exemption from His previous prohibition.  But Yahweh said no.

The implications for him were stark.  If he did not trust Yahweh and obey Him, like Moshe he would be prohibited from being the Messiach who entered the promised land with his people.  He would be no different than their father Adam.  His leadership would be compromised like Moshe’s.

Suddenly last night’s experience struck him as of more importance than he had given it.  He was being tested to see if he would trust Yahweh or not.  He was being tried like Yisrael was in difficult circumstances.  Would he be found wanting?  Faith could not really be proven without a supreme challenge.  Avraham was asked to sacrifice Yitz’chak.  Moshe was asked to speak to the rock.  What was he being asked to do?

“Father, I do not want to fail to trust you in all circumstances.  I know you love me and have called me for this purpose.  I will meditate on your precepts and fix my eyes on your ways.  I will delight in your statutes; I will not forget your word.  Deal bountifully with your servant that I may live and keep your word.”

As nightfall settled on the yeshimon yet one more day, he fully expected to sleep like a child in his mother’s arms.  But almost immediately he got that sensation again that he was being watched.  And then a strange and low growl sent chills up his spine.  There was definitely something out there and it was not friendly.  He stoked the fire.

“Father, this is not going to go away, is it?  The test is not over.  I know why I’m here and I accept your purpose in my life.  Once again I must spend my night in your shadow, my refuge and my fortress.  But I am afraid.  Show me your face.  Open my eyes to see your protection.”

It was hours before he fell asleep.