Pleasing the Spirit – Ephesians 4:25-32

The Ku Klux Klansman had enjoyed his piano playing and remarked that this was the first time he had ever sat down and had a drink with a black man. That’s when Daryl Davis realized the potential for changing attitudes through loving communication and truth telling. You can read and listen to his story of bringing 200 Klansmen out of the KKK. When does a racist stop being a racist? Paul addresses these kind of issues in his prescription for pleasing the Spirit.

Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:25-32, ESV)

What does the righteousness demonstrated by love look like in practice? It looks like…

1) …telling each other the truth, both doctrinally and personally. We are family members in the Body of Christ. How can we lie to each other.

2) …resolving our conflicts with each other. We will have conflict and anger but the devil must not be allowed to use that to disturb the unity that the Holy Spirit created when He made us one body. We must follow the teaching of Jesus in Matthew 18 to resolve our issues.

3) …coming full circle in our sins from utter selfishness to utter other-ness. The thief steals because he believes what you have he deserves to have. But he doesn’t stop being a thief until he is not only not stealing but he has now come to see you as his beneficiary, sees your need as something he is called to provide for by honest work. Every sin must be rounded off this way. The adulterer must not only not see others’ spouses as fair game but must do whatever he can to help encourage marriages to remain intact. The liar must not just quit lying to protect himself but must learn to trust God with truth-telling even to his own hurt if it forwards the kingdom of God.

4) …speaking only what builds others up.

5) …not grieving the Holy Spirit. We grieve Him when we work against the One who made us one by contradicting that unity with bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, slander, and malice. We please Him when we choose to be kind, tenderhearted and forgiving toward one another. If God forgave us, we must forgive others. What we received, though we did not deserve it, we give to those who also do not deserve it.

Those of us who have “learned Christ” (4:20) are to live holy lives that center around spiritual unity.

Discussion Questions

1. What has a physician or therapist prescribed for you that really turned things around for you in a positive way?
2. Paul gives a prescription for pleasing, not grieving, the Holy Spirit.  How have you seen deceit work against church unity?
3. Why do you think unresolved anger gives leverage to Satan?
4. What other examples of “coming full circle” can you describe when it comes to completely repenting of sin?
5. How would your life change if you only spoke what was good for building others up?
6. Who do you need to forgive?