The Tribes and Us: Reuben and Better Choices

[Genesis 49 is the record of Jacob’s prophecies about his sons and Deuteronomy 33 is Moses’ blessings to each of the tribes those sons engendered.  This is an exploration of these passages and others about the tribes of Israel and what we can learn from them for us today.]

Reuben made a horrible choice to have sex with his father’s concubine (secondary wife), Zilpah.  He lost the right of firstborn because of this.  No doubt great shame attended this action and an altered relationship with his brothers, as well.  Zilpah’s sons by Jacob were Gad and Asher, and it must have been difficult for them to have respect for Reuben after what he did with their mother.  None of the brothers could any longer look up to Reuben as the firstborn.  Though they all continued to work together tending their father’s sheep herds, the honor Reuben once had was gone.

If you were Reuben, would you more or less quit?  Would you give up trying to live your life with respect?  Though he may have been tempted to give up, Reuben didn’t.  This is evident when some of the brothers, in anger over Joseph’s favored position and their father’s obvious devotion to Joseph above them, decided to kill Joseph.  When Reuben learns of it he has a choice to make.  Does he passively let them kill Joseph or save Joseph?

Reuben recognizes that he cannot actively oppose his brothers because their anger is too great and they will overpower his attempt to rescue Joseph, so he appears to be on their side and wanting to spare them the trauma of slaying Joseph outright.  He recommends letting him die in a pit, intending to rescue Joseph from the pit when the other brothers are preoccupied.  But his plan backfires.  They decide to sell Joseph into slavery, make a profit off of him and still have him out of their lives.  So when Reuben returns to release Joseph, he is gone.  The Bible says he “tore his clothes” in mourning (Genesis 37:29).

But now Reuben has another choice.  Does he tell his father what really happened to Joseph or does he go along with the lie his brothers tell about Joseph being attacked by a wild animal?  He does not have the strength of character to tell his father the truth.  Could something have been done if he had?  Could Jacob have rescued Joseph, purchased him back?  We’ll never know.  Reuben has disappointed once again.

But then later, after famine has gripped Canaan and Jacob has sent his sons to Egypt to purchase food, Joseph, who is now in charge of selling the food and who is unknown to his brothers, accuses them of spying on the land and holds Simeon captive until they bring their youngest brother Benjamin to him.  They return and tell Jacob and he is unwilling to send Benjamin back.  Reuben says, “Kill my two sons if I do not bring him back to you; put him in my hands and I will bring him back.”  Reuben is willing to be held accountable as a man of honor and makes a commitment to bring Benjamin back.  But Jacob still refuses.

Eventually the famine forces Jacob to send his sons once again to Egypt and to send Benjamin with them to comply with Joseph’s requirement, or they will starve.  This time Judah pledges to be Benjamin’s safety.  But Reuben has taken a step of growth in this whole process.  He hasn’t given up on trying to do what is right.

And neither can we.  Is it really justifiable that if we mess up badly we should therefore give up entirely?  Just the opposite should be true.  There is no justification for being anything other than loving, and whether people expect that from us or give us a chance to be better, we must be better.  Shame may dog our steps but it must not alter our steps on the path of righteousness.

I love the example of Gordon MacDonald.  MacDonald was pastoring a church and had written an influential book, Ordering Your Private World, that many had found helpful.  But then he had an affair with his wife’s best friend.  Understandably, he lost his position as pastor.  But he didn’t quit living the Christian life.  He has since found a place of service again in Christian academia and authorship.  He shares about his own failure:

“I’ve spent more than a little time trying to understand how and why some men and women in all kinds of leadership get themselves into trouble, whether the issues be moral, financial, or the abuse of power and ego. I am no stranger to failure and public humiliation. From those terrible moments of twenty years ago in my own life I have come to believe that there is a deeper person in many of us who is not unlike an assassin. This deeper person (like a contentious board member) can be the source of attitudes and behaviors we normally stand against in our conscious being. But it seeks to destroy us and masses energies that—unrestrained—tempt us to do the very things we “believe against.”

If you have been burned as deeply as I (and my loved ones) have, you never live a day without remembering that there is something within that, left unguarded, will go on the rampage. Wallace Hamilton once wrote, “Within each of us there is a herd of wild horses all wanting to run loose.”

Reuben was seeking to assassinate the “assassin” within, putting to death the deeds of the body by the Spirit, as we would say in New Testament lingo (Romans 8:13).  King David had to do the same.  Paul had to learn that God’s power was made perfect in his weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).